Hairless and Fearless!

The horrors of my experimental period of hair removal are long tales of suffering and woe, which I will mercifully spare you.

Imagine, however, razor burn on your ass, a million in-grown hairs, itchy itchy itchy private region, super sticky do-it-yourself wax all over your hands, legs, bathtub, sink... and stubble reappearing within a day regardless.

I finally conceded to the fact that I am hairy and so shall I remain. The past year, I have even received compliments to the effect that it accentuates my manly aura. Nice.

So the compromise has been whenever it starts getting curly I take a pair of clippers to it. A day or two slathered in moisturizer (let's just say I'm very conscious of the presence of my underwear against my skin), and we can then enjoy approximately two months of tasteful, unobtrusive body hair.

I sure hope no one walks in on me performing this maintenance. I stand in my bathroom naked, atop a mound of coarse black Jew-hair, doing acrobatics in front of the mirror trying to make sure all regions are evenly attended to. Comical, disturbing.

It's a good thing I chose today too. For later that night, I went to "Fairy-oke" at Halo.

Ah... Halo. The scene of so many nights of drunken homoerotic debauchery, bad decisions and insecurities.

I haven't been in well over a year (a fact widely commented on upon arrival) at first because I was working every weekend, then because I had a boyfriend, then because... well, I really don't miss the place at all.

In one sense, it is a little nice to be openly gay and not worry about it... oh but wait. That's me all the time, isn't it?

See what I mean?

When you leave a place and come back after a long absence, you have perspective.
Why are we gossiping about the hot, disdainful straight guy that everyone wants, but no one will talk to?
Why on earth would I hook up with someone that I just met and that I am not even really attracted to?
I thought we came here so that we didn't have to be insecure and self-hating.

The answers to all these questions and more can be discovered by a healthy dose of "myth-busting." Not the cool Discovery Channel kind either.

1. Human beings sequester themselves into groups and subgroups rallied around a cause, a religion, or commonalities.
2. If left to their own, these groups will develop a culture that is supported by officially sanctioned "myths" - shared understandings and interpretations that prescribe behavior and thought.
3. Everyone in the group takes these for granted and perpetuates them when need be.
4. Acceptance in the group often requires acceptance and support for these myths.

This is all fine and good. In fact, everyone is going to do it... that's not the problem. The problem is when you only ever listen to your own group's myths. You start repeating yourselves and buying into bad ideas simply for acceptance. BOO!

Respectful dialog with people from different countries, different backgrounds, different religions sharpens beliefs and can eliminate or modify stupid behaviors. DISAGREE WITH ME! PLEASE!

I don't have this all figured out and I'd love to hear your input!

Imagine a gay man and a conservative Evangelical in a loving friendship. One might learn something about the value of love and family; the other might learn the value of letting loose a little and start [maybe] even loving and enjoying the company of people outside the Jesus bubble.

Or maybe even about the value of hair removal!!


David says, "Well, of course I do my ass! No one wants to be pulling hair out of his mouth!"